Documenting Our Days

We've moved to AnnieBrogan.com

2011-06-01T17:16:00.001-04:00

WHY ARE YOU STILL CHECKING THIS BLOG???

THIS IS NO LONGER WHERE IT'S AT, PEOPLE!

The NEW blog is anniebrogan.com

Don't forget to bookmark or subscribe to the new site!

Okay, THIS is really the end.

2011-05-27T16:26:00.000-04:00

Just a friendly reminder...

Those of you who have subscribed to "documenting our days" and are STILL GETTING THIS in your RSS feed, don't forget to change the link to:

anniebrogan.com

The end

2011-05-24T14:26:00.001-04:00

This is the last post of getagarman.blogspot.com.

It's been fun to blog here and "document our days" the last 3 1/2 years. It has whet my appetite for writing, and has made me think about writing more seriously.

So, this is not the end of my blogging days...it may really only be the beginning.

A HUGE thanks goes out to Kevin Dowker for the (I don't even WANT to know how many) hours of work he has put into this project. It all started with a simple phone call on New Year's Day asking Kevin how to make TABS on my blog. Six months and a bunch of hard work later, he has transformed it into this...

(drum roll, please....)

AnnieBrogan.com

May it be...For the Glory of HIS Name (No....not Kevin Dowker's name--the name of Jesus. My husband says this pronoun is rather ambiguous and I need to clarify).

Historic Half-Marathon

2011-05-18T16:39:00.001-04:00

I approach road races the same way I do childbirth: lots of chap-stick, hydration, a good watch, and a motivational playlist on my IPOD. For the Marine Corps Historic Half Marathon, it was no different.

In the spirit of race recaps (this is a link to the last time I ran this race)
Here is My 2011 RACE REVIEW (Mile Markers are Approximate):

Mile 1: I start in the way back so that psychologically I feel fast as I pass everyone.

Mile 3: I feel like I'm in an inverted parade as people on the sidelines cheer, hand out Twizzlers and other goodies, and ring bells.

Mile 4: A seventy year old man in front of me is running without a shirt. I watch his love handles bounce up and down for awhile, contemplating entropy and other deep topics.

Mile 5: People on the sidelines are passing out cups of water with a lime. I pass by them, change my mind, and GO BACK so that I can get a drink. I chug... and realize immediately they are passing out VODKA with a sugar-coated rim.

Mile 7: A man with a long brown pony tail and abnormally large calves is wearing dainty women's sandals. I take one headphone out of my ear and ask, "How's that working for you?" and hope that I don't sound snotty as I pass him.

Mile 8: The shirt in front of me says Pain is temporary-Pride is Forever, and I contemplate whether or not that is true (Forever? Really?), and whether or not pride (regardless of how long it endures) should be the motivation.

Mile 9: A man at the top of the biggest hill in the race is holding a sign that says, "Chuck Norris never ran a half-marathon." I smile, find new inspiration, and tell Chuck Norris jokes to myself the rest of the way up the hill.

Mile 10: Two-ton-calves-sandal-man is ahead of me now and I mentally take a laso, catch him, and reel him in (It's called mental imagery...WHAT?....you've never tried it?). Once he's right in front of me, I pretend like I'm in a wheelchair and he's pulling me (Don't knock it; it works...kind of).

Mile 12: I pass my car and wonder what the ramifications would be if I just hopped in and drove away. I'm mad at myself that I can't sustain an 8 minute mile pace (even in the wheel chair) for the second half of the race.

Mile 13: I have absolutely no reason to sprint to the finish line. No one is waiting for me and no one there cares. I am listening to a song on the IPOD and wondering how it got on my running playlist.

"Jesus, I am resting, resting...in the joy of Who you are..."

It completely does not fit the occasion... but then again....it fits in every way.

*Time: 1:59:20

Can't Not

2011-05-16T22:39:00.001-04:00

When Melissa became a vegan, she was quick to say that it was most likely just the "next big thing." We all laughed at her because 1. we've seen this pattern in her, but 2. we all can relate to this phenomenon that she put a name to. I, too, have a tendency to get excited about something, spend a bunch of time and energy on it only to get sick of it and move on to the next thing that will bring an adrenaline rush.

In the last 6 months I've been working on a project...and quitting the project....picking it back up....and despising it....going back to it....wishing I had never started it....feeling motivated about it....feeling discouraged about it...loving it...hating it...but all along knowing that I can't NOT do it.

It's a vulnerable thing: trying something. Doing something. Many days I'd rather not attempt anything at all, and just enjoy the benefits of what others have done. Other days I feel more ambitious and I desire not only to consume culture, but to create it.

I have no idea what will come of my efforts, and (as a friend just told me), I may never know. Am I creating enough tension yet? Yes? No? Maybe? Stay tuned for the "UNVEILING".....

Chastised

2011-05-14T13:38:00.000-04:00

I love to blog. Ever since Clint Clifton explained this term to me and designed a blog to use during the Iceland Project, I have really enjoyed the new hobby. I have found blogging to be a great outlet for creativity, a fun way to keep in touch with friends and family around the globe, and (surprisingly) a way to meet new people.

When we were in Iceland, I got a phone call from an American woman who found my blog and just happened to be in the area visiting family. She came over for lunch, we found out she lives in Northern Virginia, and have kept in touch through facebook ever since. Last week, she brought us dinner and gifts for the kids after moving houses (again).

Another woman found our blog on a google search while we were in Iceland, was planning on going through Iceland on her way to Europe, and asked if I needed anything. At the time I was pregnant, and that generous woman stuffed her suitcase full of Kraft Spiral Mac and Cheese, Saltines, and maternity jeans and delivered them right to our door step in Reykjavik.

I could go on about the blog reader who sent us a BEYOND WORDS amazing gift this year or the blog reader who brought me curtains in Iceland (Johanna, did you want those back?), but really what I want to highlight are the blog readers who have given me ENCOURAGEMENT to keep writing. The last year has not been the easiest, and I know I haven't recorded everything that I've gone through as thoroughly as I set out to do. Recently, someone "chastised" me for not writing more about my experience with Gracie, and it really made me start to think...

All I'll say for now is that I have been taking VERY SERIOUSLY my New Year's Resolution of writing more and seeing where it leads to the point of paying for childcare every other week (You know that's gotta be serious). More to be revealed soon...

My Cons of Homeschooling

2011-05-09T16:48:00.001-04:00

And now the moment you've all been waiting for....

I've made it sound pretty good, huh? Field trips, short school days, rich learning experiences for everyone, and math lessons over pancakes in our pajamas. So, WHY DOESN'T EVERYONE DO THIS?

Well, let me preface this by saying that these may not really be CONs of homeschooling, just CONs of MY first year homeschooling. Maybe other moms who homeschool do not experience these CONS. It might just be unique to me because I had a baby at the beginning of the school semester (a baby who had two open heart surgeries, mind you), moved two times, and lived in a town where I hardly knew any other homeschooling moms.

1. TUMBLE WEEDS

My biggest CON of homeschooling this year was the feeling of isolation. Have you ever done a really hard work out with a group of people? Because there is competition, conversation, and a sense of togetherness, the work out is tolerable and at times even enjoyable. Try doing the same work out alone, and it's just plain harder. There were some moments this year where I felt the tumbleweeds rolling by...those moments usually came when the only source of competition during math games and spelling bees were stuffed and/or plastic.

If you're an extrovert like me, it's essential to find a homeschooling co-op. We were on the waiting list for one in our area all year long, but never got in. This would not have been a con if I had quickly connected to other homeschooling families in the area and had more learning outings with others.

2. EXHAUSTION vs. GUILT

Homeschooling means that you are not only the Language Arts teacher, Math teacher, Science and History teacher, but you're also the cafeteria worker, the janitor, the nurse, the assistant principal, and the recess supervisor. After trying to, also, give attention to the specials such as art, music, computers, PE, and library, you are the bus driver and the after-school care.

I vacillated between two extremes all year long:
1. trying to give my kids an above-average learning experience in all of the above mentioned categories and wearing myself out....
2. or doing the bare minimum and then feeling guilty that I wasn't doing more.

3. ANSWERING THE CRITICS

If you choose to homeschool, you need to be both confident in your reasons and prepared for the criticism. You need to learn how to maneuver through conversations with a lump in your throat while you are being critiqued on an area of your home-schooling you feel insecure about. You need to be able to stomach the comments people will make about how lousy of an education home-schoolers receive, disregard the soliloquies about socialization, and be confident that you are doing what is best for your child at that particular point in time.

4. UNDER THE MICROSCOPE

Let me illustrate with a story:

The other day I heard a story of a girl who had a normal public school experience all the way through high school. There were no issues with this girl until she went away to another state for college. After being dropped off, there was heightened anxiety, severe home-sickness, multiple trips back home, and an inability to stay focused on her school work. Finally the parents decided it was best for their daughter to attend a local college where these issues wouldn't come up.

I laughed out loud when I heard this story. Not because I'm a cold-hearted snake, but because IF THAT GIRL HAD BEEN HOME-SCHOOLED, WE NEVER WOULD HEAR THE END OF IT. I guess that's just what comes with the territory. Home-schooling is different, so it's put under the microscope more.

****

So, there you have it. Just like everything in life, there are advantages and disadvantages to educating your kids at home. As far as what we'll do next year, we'll just have to wait and see where we are living and assess it then. For us, the choice to homeschool is not a final one. Each year, we have to assess what is best for each of our kids in light of what is going on in our lives. It's a decision that will be given a lot thought and prayer. Stay tuned for the rest of the story...

Pros of Homeschooling: Part 4

2011-05-08T16:48:00.000-04:00

I've alluded to this in other posts, but I have found a huge advantage of homeschooling is being able to determine what curriculum* my children spend their day studying and discussing. During our unit on Egypt, many questions came up about death and the afterlife. I was thankful that I was able to direct the discussion on these difficult matters, point my kids to the Bible for answers, and freely point out the wrong thinking of our ancestors (Don't be tempted to call me narrow-minded...Do YOU really think our ancestors in Egypt went to eternal joy in the afterlife if--and ONLY IF--their dead heart weighed the same as a feather?!).

During the Advent season, we spent time learning the Christmas story and during Lent, highlighted the significance of the Easter. I know many Christians who do a good job teaching their kids and instilling in them Christian values even though they are in public school. That is not the point. I'm simply observing, after home-schooling for the first time, that it is a big advantage to be in control of your curriculum.

*The curriculum we chose this year:
Sonlight: Language Arts and History
MathUSee: Math
Random books from Tracee Pelt: Science and Social Studies

Guilty

2011-05-03T21:37:00.001-04:00

In late March, I got pulled over for the first time in my life. I was on my way to a pediatric cardiologist appointment in Charlottesville and had even made a commitment that morning to NOT, under any circumstances, speed. That commitment apparently only lasted 20 minutes because on Route 3 a sheriff flagged me down and gave me a ticket. I felt distraught...ashamed...helpless.

There was only one hope: a court date on May 3rd.

Today I woke up and rushed the three girls out the door to the Spotsylvania General District Court. I was shaky because I didn't know what I should plead nor what to expect, but I tried to sell it to the kids as a fun field trip.

"Will there be a KID'S SECTION at this courtroom?" Haley wondered.

The more she learned about what to expect from our outing, the more unimpressed she became. A room full of people who had done bad things, a judge, and a lot of waiting. Oh, and a long drive to the other county.

"Can you please not call this a field trip?" She asked, rolling her six-year old eyes.

We listened to Part Four of Mere Christianity as we made our way down south of the Rappahannock. After getting lost deep off of exit 126 and having to stop twice to ask for directions, I was getting more and more nervous as the clock edged closer to 9:30. I stepped on the gas and then realized the irony of the situation: speeding so that I could go to court to pay a speeding ticket. Haley was getting carsick on the curvy roads and I was beginning to regret not just paying the fine online. We arrived at the Spotsylvania Courthouse at 9:31 and, after digging through a suitcase in our car to look for a pacifier, had to jog through the unfamiliar campus to find the General District Court. Once inside the right building I was informed that cell phones were not allowed to even ENTER the courtroom. I tried to explain that my cell phone was dead, it's charger far away in Pennsylvania so it wouldn't disrupt in any way, but the sherriff kindly told me to either go back to my car or hide it in the bushes outside.

We akwardly reversed ourselves back out the door and I attempted to hide my phone in the mulch pit so no criminals could find it. Back through security check-in and, this time, I passed. As I opened the double doors to go in the court room I noticed multiple signs saying the same thing: No shorts allowed.

I stared at the sign. I stared down at my shorts. Was this whole hour-long trip in vain? Would the judge refuse to speak to me since my calves were exposed? I tried to imagine how long it would take me to safety pin the car mats together to make a skirt and then remembered: I had suitcases still in the car from our Pennsylvania trip. I told the kids to hold on to either side of the stroller and we ran to the parking lot where I threw on jeans and hoped the construction workers weren't looking.

Through security check-in for the third time, and this time they wished me luck and waved to the baby who had now become comfortable enough to coo at them. We took our seats by the aisle and had just gotten settled with our Highlights magazines when Gracie's pacificer did a projectile launch down the aisle and she let out a jubilant "WAwaWAwaWAWAWAWA!"

A sheriff came over and asked us to wait in the hallway until our case was called. At this point I was ready to go to the public library down the street and pay the fine on a computer. We waited in the hallway on the floor until we were called to the front. The judge was trying to hide his smile as Gracie was gnawing on her toes and asked me for my statement. I sighed. What could I say? I told him that I was guilty and that I had come simply to ask for mercy. The kids, dressed in their Easter dresses, blinked at him with their baby blues. He sighed, looked through my flawless record, gave me $50 off the ticket and sent me on my way.

I think I spent almost that much to GET to the courthouse, but nonetheless...a rich learning experience indeed. Over brunch I got to teach my girls about the dangers of speeding and this evening in our prayers we thanked Jesus for being our advocate before the Great Judge and for giving mercy even when we are found guilty.

Learning to Chew

2011-04-30T14:17:00.002-04:00

My best friend from Wisconsin recently became a Christian. What I love most about talking with Melissa Kane Snider is that she is not versed in Christian lingo nor learned in evangelical expressions. Conversing with her and her experience of following Jesus is fresh and life-giving.

Recently Melissa asked me if I had read any C.S. Lewis.

"Yes," I answered proudly. "Colby is reading the Chronicles of Narnia to the kids every night before bed."

I could almost hear her rolling her eyes over the phone.

"No..not his children's fiction. Have you read any of his adult level books?"

I went on the explain that I found his style too heavy and his points too thick to chew. I simply did not have time in my life to take a fine tooth comb to my theology and splice hairs with Lewis.

She sounded disappointed. "Everyone always says that. Why do so many Christians think that?"

After hanging up the phone I began to consider my lazy habits as a Christian. Maybe instead of complaining about the thickness of the meat, I needed to work at strengthening my jaw. Thinking about the deeper things of God to the end that I could articulate them better to others. Enough Christian Living easy reading. The time had come to delve into the Christian classics.

Now, don't applaud me yet. I've only been listening to his most famous work, Mere Christianity, in the car while i go places, but it's a start. I'm not sure if it's easier or harder to do it that way. I feel like I have to listen to his paragraphs two or three times before I feel ready to move on to the next section. Sometimes I'll pause it to just reflect or pray that the truths will sink deep into my bones. It's truly an amazing work.

As I've been listening, I am both inspired and defeated as a writer. Inspired because I know that I, too, want to spend my life writing about my journey with God and defeated because I could never in my wildest dreams be as articulate as he. But I digress from the point entirely (Hey! That sounded EXACTLY like something He would say!).

Today I'm blogging about this book because...when I find something good, I want EVERYONE I know and love to also experience it. If you're a Christian, this book will deepen you in places you didn't even know needed strengthening. And, if you're not a Christian, you really should be. I'll let C.S. Lewis tell you all the reasons why. You can order it HERE.

My Favorite Easter Eggs

2011-04-28T22:32:00.000-04:00

Pros of Homeschooling: Part 3

2011-04-12T10:14:00.001-04:00

Because my kids are only in Kindergarten and first grade, we only spend two hours a day doing school. The reality is, that's all the time you really need to do lessons; homeschooling takes less time than a public school day. That means all sorts of things: We have longer weekends, longer vacations, more family time, more time to develop other interests, and more time to be involved in church-related activities and/or help people in need.

I think a huge advantage of homeschooling is the flexibility you have with your schedule and your life. Because we're in ministry, every day is different. Some evenings my husband has meetings until 11:30 pm (or even later!). We see him more since we don't have to rush to the bus stop first thing in the morning.

When we found out our baby was in need of two open heart surgeries this year, we knew our lives would consist of a lot of time in the hospital and at Doctor's appointments. Having the flexibility to make our own schedule each day is one of the biggest reasons we chose to homeschool this year (that and the fact that we didn't know where we were going to live this year!).

Cherry Blossom Festival 2011

2011-04-08T09:56:00.000-04:00

Romans

2011-04-06T22:01:00.000-04:00

Colby preached a great message on Sunday on Romans 1:18-25: The Invisible God. Probably the best message I've heard on that passage. CLICK HERE and scroll down to the right to see it. That's my boy!

Pros of Homeschooling: Part 2

2011-03-31T11:49:00.002-04:00

Another big advantage of homeschooling (especially in this area) is the opportunity to reinforce your lessons with field trips. We have really taken advantage of living only 35 minutes from our nation's capitol and used it to our advantage. For example...

Math SOL 1.3: The student will count backward by ones from 20.

On one of the "it-is-too-perfect-weather-to-be-inside" days this year, we headed to DC for a picnic. Since I knew we were focusing on this standard, all day long as we crossed the streets, we counted down from 20 with the streetlights. By the end of the day, this skill was mastered! And we all got a fun break from the daily grind.

Science SOL 1.5: The student will investigate and understand that animals have life needs and specific physical characteristics.

We happened to schedule this just right by going to DC's National Zoo on that gorgeous 70 degree day in February. For the first part of our time there, we discussed and pointed out habitats, coverings, defense mechanisms (no, not MINE...animal's....), and life needs.

History SOL 1.2: The student will describe the stories of American leaders (Abraham Lincoln, George Washington) and their contributions to our country.

This one was too easy. Lunch on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial (complete with reading the Gettysburg Address) and the National Museum of American History where the exhibit Abraham Lincoln: An Extraordinary Life showcased many artifacts from his life including one of his top hats.

I'll stop there because I think you get the idea, but my kids have visited numerous Civil War battlefields, George Washington's home and grave, the White House, an art studio in Old Town Alexandria, and many of the Smithsonian Museums. I realize that some people don't have access to our (free!) National Museums, but I think the world is a classroom and there are many rich learning moments everywhere. A big advantage of homeschooling is getting to show them to your children yourself.

Pros of Homeschooling: Part 1

2011-03-17T15:07:00.002-04:00

As I've started "officially" homeschooling this year, I've become acutely aware of the many pros and many cons of this educational style. I think we've all seen homeschooling gone wrong, but in an effort to look at the positive side, my next couple of posts on the blog will be focusing on the pros of homeschooling. In all fairness, at the end I'll share what I've found to be the cons.

Okay, today's pro will be quick: ST. PATRICK'S DAY

I feel like I might be learning more than my kids this year. Yes, I realize that I'm teaching kindergarten and first grade, but before today, I had never taken any time to actually find out who this guy St. Patrick was. Today we read an article about this British-born man who was captured and taken to Ireland as a slave and his life as a missionary in Ireland. WHO KNEW? Today, on what is thought of to be the anniversary of this Saint's death, we prayed for missionaries we know around the world and talked about people we could share the hope of Christ with. We hunted for three leafed clovers and discussed how St. Patrick used them as an illustration to teach the doctrine of the Trinity. All in all, it was a pretty rich lesson found in the most unexpected place for me. I had never been taught any of that! Most kids will come home from school today with green pencil erasers or clover-shaped art projects, but have no clue the significance behind the man we celebrate today. Being able to have a say in what my kids spend their day studying is definitely a pro of homeschooling.

Christ Beside Me

Christ Before Me

Christ Behind Me

Christ Within Me

Christ Beneath Me

Christ Above Me

-Saint Patrick

Clean and Happy

2011-03-14T23:26:00.001-04:00

First Fundraiser

2011-03-09T16:05:00.001-05:00

When the kids were in PA for 10 days during Gracie's surgery, they spent hours doing Perler Bead Projects. Now we have a huge zip loc bag full of these things. Darcy came up with the idea to have a store, and I guided the entrepreneurial effort by suggesting the profits could go to the local crisis pregnancy center. We had a speaker from CARE NET Pregnancy Resource Center come the other week and the kids have been filling up a baby bottle with change to give to this organization. If anyone is interested in buying some of their products, let us know! We will have our "store" in the bag wherever we go the next few weeks. The store has also expanded to include the boat Haley made at the Children's Museum, a purse Haley made from old fabric and tape, and buttons that Darcy found who-knows-where. They're not as tasty as girl scout cookies, but we hope to fill many baby bottles with change from this fundraiser!

Saturday

2011-03-07T16:09:00.001-05:00

We started out by taking a family walk through Prince William Forest Park and doing the circuit trail with all the fun exercises.

Next on the agenda: Fly the kite that I bought last fall for $1.00.

When I bought it, I dreamed of taking it to the DC's Kite Festival in March. We needed a little practice first before the big day. After trying to undo a huge knot from the previous owner, we were ready to roll....

And, we're off...

...and...

that only lasted a total of three seconds before it nose dived.

Colby said if he was Jason Pelt or Brett Garman he would fiddle with it to fix the bearings,
but really that means....

Maybe next year.

1 John 4:18

2011-03-03T15:44:00.000-05:00

It all started when I read Haley's writing assignment for Thanksgiving: Tell me something that you're thankful for A-Z. Most kids would happily write of apples, balloons, cats, and ducks. Not my Haley Jane.

Listen to letter A: I am thankful that Aligatrs are not in are howse.
Letter B: I am thankful that nuthing Bit me.
Fast forward to Letter X: I am thankful I nevr so a fox.

Haley is acutely aware of all the traumatic things that could possibly occur in this world, and this Thanksgiving, she is just thankful that none of them have happened to her yet.

Today as we were having a picnic lunch out on the patio, a black bug the size of a molecule landed on Haley's shoulder and she began to cry...uncontrollably. She started to bring her lunch inside where she could eat in peace, but I intercepted her before she got to the door.

"Haley, you are NOT going inside; this is RIDICULOUS." I was firm.

"MOM..." she wined, "Almost EVERYONE in our family has been stung by a bee (Only Colby and I have ever been stung), and I DON'T want to get stung."

"Okay, you know what?" I was starting to come up with a plan. "Come here. Sit on my lap."

I had to pick her up and carry her stiff little body over to my patio chair because she wouldn't comply.

"Now, I want to talk to you about this. What's your BIGGEST FEAR?"

She didn't even take a moment to think about it, "Getting stung, getting bit, getting run over by a car, getting our house burned down, earthquakes..." I had to cut her off.

"Okay, let's just go there. Let's just SAY that it your fears ACTUALLY came true. Let's pretend that you were getting stung by a swarm of bees during an earthquake while your house was burning down...."

Pause for a second. Okay, before you write me off as an insensitive mother, I think it's called cognitive restructuring therapy and I read about it during my class COUNSELING METHODS. We all have fears, and as you can probably tell by my offspring, I struggle with many of them. I guess since it's one of my weaknesses, I've had to learn how to manage them.

When Gracie was getting ready for her second surgery, I was going through--what I can now look back and see to be--major stress: inability to accomplish small tasks, numbness in my face, and trouble sleeping. As I was talking to Eileen, it became clear what my main fear was. I kept envisioning sitting in the waiting room during her surgery and seeing the doctor walk grimly and apologetically into the room with the worst news a parent can hear. I thought that I was doing myself a favor, preparing myself for this scene. Almost as if...if it did happen, I would be ready because I had already practiced my response. My husband says that I do this as a way of trying to control my environment, and I can't really disagree with his assessment. However, in my attempt to control the future and prepare myself for the worst, I didn't take away any of my stress. I only added to it.

My friend's advice was simple, yet profound. GO THERE. Go to the waiting room that is laced with darkness and anxiety, fear and trepidation and watch the doctor walk in with tears running down his face. Imagine that you are sitting there and your biggest fear happens. Now picture Jesus there in the waiting room with you, holding you while you get the news.

Back to the conversation on the deck:

"Okay, let's just go there. Let's just SAY that it your fears ACTUALLY came true. Let's pretend that you were getting stung by a swarm of bees during an earthquake while your house was burning down....AND Jesus was right there with you, comforting you. Would that be so bad?"

She leaned her head on my chest as I continued, smiling as if she liked this exercise.

"I mean, think about it. Bethanee's house burned down to the ground. And, when you saw her last night, was she still crying about it? Your worst fear HAPPENED to her...and she's fine."

"Yeah...I guess," she admitted, rather sheepishly.

I guess this is what Paul is trying to communicate in Philippians chapter four. "The LORD is AT HAND. BE ANXIOUS FOR NOTHING, but in everything through prayer and supplication with thanksgiving make your requests known to God." We don't have to worry about the future because God is with us (in the present and the future) and will send His peace to guard our hearts and minds like a soldier faithfully standing watch.

As I look back at Haley's Thankful journal, a theme emerges: she is afraid of pain. I think that's the common denominator for all of us. Losing a loved one is scary for us because we don't want to experience the pain of loneliness and grief. Interestingly enough, dying is not one of the things Haley is afraid of. As she was listing off her fears, she caught herself before adding death and said, "Well, dying is not so bad because then I don't have to even WORRY about bees or fires or earthquakes or getting run over."

It was at that moment that Darcy looked up from her water experiment on the ground and added, "Are there CARS in heaven? Cause I know there's streets of GOLD."

I'm not sure, Darcy. All I know is that it is a place where there is no fear.

Because Perfect Love casts out Fear (I John 4:18).

Green Grass

2011-02-26T16:02:00.001-05:00

On Tuesday, I was having a funk day. It was probably just fatigue after a jam-packed weekend, but nonetheless, every little chore felt monumental. I was sitting in a exhausted stupor after lunch watching the kids nag each other, despairing that all my training and hard work with them had been in vain. This came after a discouraging day homeschooling as Haley's backwards 5s and Zs almost sent me to the psychiatric ward. So there I was, thinking how I needed find a better job and dreaming about the green grass on other side of the fence, when the moment came. Darcy had put a saddle and reins on Haley and was riding her around the living room. Suddenly, the rodeo got violent, Haley reared on her hind legs, Darcy fell off backwards, and Haley stood up, exclaiming, "My tooth! I lost my first tooth!"

As I was cleaning up the blood, I thought how ironic it was that not only I WAS THERE for this landmark event, but I also was watching as it happened. Sure, being at home with your kids can be mundane and discouraging, but it also allows for days like today. I got to watch as Haley paid her sister two dollars for her assistance in getting the tooth out (It had been loose for months, but Haley was too scared to ever wiggle it!), and help Haley spell some words for her letter to the tooth fairy (Dear tooth farey, can you plese leave the tooth? I realy like it.) We also discovered that Gracie was getting her FIRST tooth, so it turned into an all-out-Tooth-Day-Tuesday celebration complete with balloons and bananas (hey, cut me a break; they kind of look like teeth).

After getting a power nap that was cheaper and much more effective than a mental institution, the day ended with this conversation:

Haley: Mom, can you please sneak into my room after I fall asleep and leave me a little special somethin' somethin' under my pillow?

Me: Well...uh....what about the tooth fairy?

Haley: I don't believe in the tooth fairy. I....I.....I just believe in God.

I think I'll keep my job.

Old Guard Fife & Drum Military Demonstration at Mount Vernon...

2011-02-25T09:02:00.001-05:00

...and my two year old niece's reaction.

President's Day Weekend

2011-02-23T23:22:00.000-05:00

I don't think we've ever done President's Day weekend right before. This year we did it justice, thanks to the Pennsylvania Garmans coming down for a visit. The weekend included a twelve passenger van, twenty dollars worth of parking at the National Zoo (where we witnessed an ape repeatedly drinking its urine), forty-five degree weather at Mount Vernon (Brett, you told me it would be 70 degrees!), seven kids, three strollers, two hours at the Smithsonian Air and Space Center, and one failed bowling outing. I think I smell a tradition starting...

My Mom

2011-02-15T18:15:00.002-05:00

Every February, my mom visits us. This tradition started back in February of 2003 on a snow day. I will still in my pajamas, and Colby suddenly got very concerned that we didn't have any milk. He insisted that at the very moment, we HAD to BOTH go to Food Lion and pick some up. I threw a coat on and followed him, feeling very confused.

We walked through the aisles, and I kept looking around, not sure what was going to happen. Then it happened. I heard the same dog whistle that my mother had always used to find us when we got separated in a store. I looked over by the eggs, and there she was. My mother, in a red feather boa, singing Let Me Call You Sweetheart (I sincerely apologize to everyone out there who does not have a mom who is nearly this fun). So, the tradition began. Last year, she even flew to Iceland for her annual visit.

This year's visit included Bull Run Battlefield in Manassas, lots of bargain shopping, and lots of episodes of The Middle. The highlight of the trip, however, came when we were driving on 395 North to Reagan National Airport... and she tried to convince me that if we wore HELMETS in the car, the chances of us getting into an accident and getting brain damage would significantly decrease.

I LOVE MY MOM!!

Happy Valentines Day!

2011-02-14T03:48:00.000-05:00

Always Missing

2011-02-12T18:02:00.003-05:00

I think this picture pretty much sums up my life.

No matter how hard I try, there is always one sock missing.

The other day we had two appointments on the calendar. I rehearsed with the kids our schedule for the day, I packed lunches, I made sure I had a bottle ready, and I even got the house all picked up so that it would look perfect when we returned home. I was trying so hard. We checked off all the subjects for school, we all had clean bodies and all the kids nails were finally trimmed. Then, fearing that Colby's rather casual pace would make us late to the appointment, I tried to motivate him by using an abrasive tone and shame tactics. In my desperate attempt to execute the day perfectly, I failed.

Lesson Learned: I will NEVER have it totally together.

Not only will I never attain perfection, but neither will my house.

Even if there IS a moment
when the last of the laundry is folded and put away,
the kitchen sink is empty and shiny,
the carpet's vacuum lines are freshly parallel,
the bathroom smells good,
the dust has all been eradicated,
and the toothpaste has all been chiseled from the sink...

It will only last...until somebody moves.

Even if I did somehow manage to keep my house to looking like a museum, I will still fall short in my relationships, snap at my mom when she puts cups on the wrong rack of the dishwasher, or passive-aggressively punish Colby with silence when he chooses to read the Drudge Report instead of participating in garage-cleaning day. And, if I'm able to make it a whole day where I'm not critical of my husband and I only rebuke my kids in gentleness and love, there are inevitably attitudes of my heart that still miss the mark of perfection.

One sock is always missing.

This is rather new concept for me. Not that I wasn't taught verses like Romans 3:23 or 3:10. I knew in theory that I was a sinner, but since I've become a wife and mother I have come to a new knowledge that has been both breaking and beautiful. I realize now more than ever how desperate I am for Jesus and His grace. I will never have it together and that's okay. He is the only one who did. As I learn to live in an imperfect world and in an imperfect body, I rest on His righteousness that makes me whole. I hope you do too.

Gracie's Grandmas

2011-02-12T15:41:00.001-05:00

I learned how to post bigger pictures...yes!

The Latest...

2011-02-05T16:08:00.001-05:00

Gracie has done PHENOMONAL the last 3 weeks since her open-heart surgery. I took her to the doctor's on Wednesday and got the news: I can start to treat her like a normal baby again. For us that means picking her up under her arms, putting her in her jumper, and bathing her normally (Brett, I don't even want to hear it...).

Here's what we've done recently to celebrate:

Going Home: Day Five

2011-01-21T10:24:00.002-05:00

Gracie is ready to be released from the hospital! We will probably be gone by noon today. She has recovered extremely fast and seems almost totally free of pain with only a little tylenol to cut it down. As of last evening we could really see that she was begin to act like she normally does. So, we will spend the night at the house in Crozet and make our way back to Dumfries tomorrow.

Recovery: Day Four

2011-01-20T15:03:00.002-05:00

Last night Gracie left the PICU. This morning she had her chest tube out. She has just one more line that needs to come out and she will not have any left. She is eating well and her appetite is starting to pick up. Were not sure yet how many more days she'll need at the hospital, but she is doing great.

Recovery: Day Three

2011-01-19T10:05:00.003-05:00

Gracie looks great this morning! She continued to have a good appetite through out the day, remained pretty comfortable, and has resumed playing with her binky. There is a chance she may move out of intensive care today since she is doing so well.

Recovery: Day Two

2011-01-18T10:55:00.003-05:00

Gracie looks a lot more comfortable this morning than she did last night. She has been eating 2-3 ounces at a time and seems much happier. She was awake for a while this morning and staring at us without crying and fussing. As you can see, she looks quite a bit better than yesterday right after surgery.

Broccoli with Lemon Juice

2011-01-17T22:00:00.001-05:00

For making it to the top of the staircase on one of her positive-behavior- reinforcement charts, Darcy earned a ticket for a date with the parent of her choice. She chose me. I was flattered and whisked her off one evening to Panera for dessert by the fireplace. I had run across an article about taking time to ask your children questions and really listening to their answers. As she sipped on her smoothie and nibbled on her cornbread, I took some of the suggested questions in an effort to get to know my middle child better.

"Darcy," I began as she crawled in my lap. "What is something that mommy does that you wish she wouldn't do?" I cringed as I awaited her response. It had not exactly been a stress-free year. Between trying to homeschool her older sister to taking care of her baby sister, surely I had lost my temper with her a few times. I'm sure she'll ask me to not get so loud when I'm frustrated. Or maybe she'll ask that I don't grab her arm so tightly when I'm trying to get her to listen to me. Perhaps she'll ask me to use less hostile methods to get her to obey.

"Well..." I braced myself for her answer. How could I reverse the scars that I've given my child? "Can you please not give me broccoli ever again?" I furrowed my brow as I tried to understand. "I only like broccoli with lemon juice."

Kids are so resilient. So forgiving. I've made so many mistakes that I've feared to be irreversible, but here all Darcy can complain about is the dish of broccoli that I apparently forgot to season with lemon juice.
Haley and Darcy, as you are in Pennsylvania this week with Grandparents, please know that I love you and miss you. Soon we'll be together again, restored, refreshed, and healed. I look forward to the time we'll have catching up over a freshly steamed plate of lemon broccoli.

The Champ: Part 2

2011-01-17T18:31:00.004-05:00

There she is! Gracie continues to remind us that she is one tough character. We are so glad that everything has gone so well and look forward to her getting through the next couple of days as restfully as possible. She is really uncomfortable, as one would expect, but the doctors and nurses are taking great care of her. Here is the flashback from August.

Real live baby doll

2011-01-17T09:44:00.000-05:00

I came downstairs to the playroom the other day to find Gracie like this on the floor. Her sisters must have had a fun time playing dress up with her; Gracie just kicks and coos and loves all the attention.

The Glenn

2011-01-16T21:48:00.000-05:00

That's the name of the surgery Gracie is having tomorrow morning. For the curious reader you can go check it out. For the rest of you, it will suffice to say that it is a 4-5 hour open-heart surgical procedure that will help Gracie maintain a tolerable Oxygen saturation in her blood for the next couple of years. If all goes well, we should be looking at a 4-6 day stay at UVA Hospital in Charlottesville, VA. Stay tuned for updates throughout the day and thank you for your support and prayers.

Arranged Friendship

2011-01-15T09:30:00.000-05:00

This is Gracie's BFF, Ainsley (Josh and Jadey Burke's daughter), who came over to play. She was born less than a month after Gracie. I think--by default--they will be friends for life.

Pros and Cons of Homeschooling

2011-01-10T14:36:00.003-05:00

PROs
1. Being able to spend cold mornings inside by the fireplace talking about Egypt, mummies, souls, pyramids, and the afterlife. (Yes, we still have our Christmas tree up. Don't judge me.)
CONs
1. Having a mountain of unused toilet paper on the bathroom floor for the next week.

Thank you, Aunt Jennie...

2011-01-10T14:34:00.000-05:00

...for my new Jumper. As you can see, It's giving me a good workout. Soon I'll have strong neck muscles and not almost fall out of the leg holes!

The wife of a preacher-man

2011-01-10T14:14:00.002-05:00

Yup...I married a good one. If you want, you can even listen to Colby's messages at the church website. Type in Esther into the search box at the bottom of the page to listen to his sermon on the book of Esther, otherwise you'll see the most recent one (on one of the hardest books of the Bible, Zechariah) there in the audio files.

Here's to 2010

2011-01-07T15:30:00.003-05:00

I am pretty happy with my digital scrapbook for this year; however, I wanted to rearrange the page order and couldn't figure out how to do it. It allows for some creativity, but conveniently allows you to choose a page layout and background. Lots of options. You can finish an entire year of scrap booking in...approximately...6-10 hours (depending on how much of a perfectionist you are). I think that's worth it!
Here's the link: The Best of 2010

Happy New Year

2011-01-01T09:37:00.000-05:00

The tradition continues...

Merry Christmas, everyone!

2010-12-22T14:10:00.000-05:00

On Freud and Fingers

2010-12-22T14:06:00.001-05:00

If you go through all of our pictures, you will notice a pattern: In MOST of them, Darcy has her hands in her mouth and is biting her fingers. I'm not sure why this has developed, but I guess she's never broken out of what Freud called the "oral stage." I have recently tried different techniques to help her fingers (which are now raw and red) to heal. However, with Darcy, you never know what's going to work. One time in an effort to administer some creative correction, I put pepper on her tongue after she was using it to be snide. She looked up at me with excited, wide eyes and exclaimed, "I love that...what is it?" The next day she asked me for some more pepper.

My most recent attempt at healing her fingers was found in the cosmetics aisle at Wal-Mart: exfoliating gloves. When I catch her with her fingers in her mouth, chewing away, I make her put them on.

It seems as though little sister has picked up on her big sister's habits. Gracie, as of late, has found much entertainment in putting her little fingers down her throat and gagging herself. It is not a pretty sight as she loses, what appears to be, half her bottle in the process. Gracie faces a similar punishment when I find her resorting to these bulemic habits...winter gloves. So, here is a picture so I can always remember my girls at this strange stage of development.

Good Report

2010-12-18T14:52:00.001-05:00

Room two was the place to be yesterday on the Cardiac Transition Unit as Gracie charmed the nurses with coos, laughs, and smiles. At 6:00 that morning when she woke up screaming, I thought it would be the longest 4 hours of my life as she had to fast before the procedure. She really surprised me by calming down and enduring without her bottle (singing some Andrew Peterson to her seemed to help).

Everything went great; looking at her today you would never know what she went through yesterday. The next open heart surgery will be sometime in early January. Thank you to everyone who prayed; we really feel like we aren't in this alone.

A Trooper

2010-12-17T10:01:00.002-05:00

It's 10:00 Am and Gracie is getting ready to go back for an exploratory catheterization. She hasn't eaten since last night, but was amazingly cute and smiley during the prep time. She should be in the cath lab for about two hours, followed by a four hour recovery. Hopefully we will be out of the hospital by this evening.

Pre-Resolution-ing

2010-12-16T11:27:00.000-05:00

Lately, I've been goal setting. This is one of my favorite past times. Every year I set goals in each domain of health: emotional, mental, social, physical, and spiritual.

I realize this is a little extreme, but nonetheless...

So, I'm going to just go ahead and share the different things I want to focus on in 2011 as a way to make myself accountable to the blogging world (There couldn't be a better accountability partner, really).

1. To take out time each week to write more and see where it leads (I'm thinking about changing to a better blog layout but need to talk to my digital media specialist friends about this....you know who you are....I need help and advice).
3. Improve at photography (insert SHOUT OUT to Kristen Marks here for the photography lesson this week).
4. Train and see how fast I can run a 5k (not sure which distance I should train for)
5. Learn to play the guitar
6. Complete digital scrapbooks from the past 2 years
7. Have 12 piano lessons with Haley

This is not a complete list.....this is just a brainstorming session that precedes the actual New Years Resolution list. Does anyone else do this..?

GG

2010-12-16T07:43:00.000-05:00

Gracie has a heart Catheterization tomorrow in Charlottesville. After this procedure, they will be able to tell when open heart surgery #2 will be. Please pray for our family's peace and strength, Gracie's recovery, and our marriage as there will be a lot of added stressors to add to the equation. Please also pray for me (Annie) to be able to sleep through the night again.

The Secrets of a Telecommuter

2010-12-15T20:45:00.000-05:00

Colby has been working from his home office a lot lately. I love having him around for breakfast and an occasional lunch break. It was especially fun to see how he dressed for a skype appointment last week...

New Gracie Tricks!

2010-12-10T12:14:00.002-05:00

Gracie is learning to sit-up....

.............well................

...........kind of.....I thought it would be mean to post the picture of the face plant.

She's not sure what to think, but I'm trying to get her used to sitting at the table with us!

Happy Thanksgiving!

2010-11-26T12:05:00.000-05:00

Today

2010-11-25T07:37:00.001-05:00

Haley's First Mile and the Story of Mine

2010-11-21T19:15:00.001-05:00

Haley ran her first race! The Turkey Trot Kid's One Mile was the perfect distance for Haley to run. After she was done, she asked me if she could run another race the next day. Addicted already? At least it's a healthy addiction! During the race, one child stopped at a port-a-potty for a quick break. It reminded me of my first race--The Sixth Grade Mile....allow me to tell the story:

You weren't allowed to join the track team at Logan Middle School until you were in 7th grade, but once a year the 6th graders were invited to have a fun run on the track. I remember showing up with my white Keds and my street clothes, ready to take on the world. The gun went off, and for the first 200 meters, I was in first place--sprinting ahead of all the boys. Reality set in after 300 meters, and I soon drifted back in the pack.

Now, as you well know, one mile is 4 laps around the track. If you can imagine with me, at one end of the track there was the starting line (which is--of course--also the finish line) and at the clear other end of the track there was a bathroom. Halfway through my 3rd lap, I started to feel thirsty. I had sprinted so hard in the beginning and was pushing a good pace, but now was starting to feel it. Not knowing any better, I exited the track and got myself a nice, long drink and even took a bathroom break. After taking a couple of minutes to catch my breath and recover, I joined the mass of others--who were now VERY spread out and even lapping each other--in finishing my 3rd lap.

Now, what happened next changed the rest of my life. I turned the corner and started running down the "home stretch" to finish lap #3. The coaches must have lost track of who was on which lap because--next thing I know--I hear the coaches shouting and yelling my name. "ANNIE HALEY!!!!! BRING IT HOME STRONG!!!!" I started to pick up the pace, not completely sure what was happening. Others started to line the track and cheer for me, "ANNIE! You're almost done!!" (Huh? I am?! ) FINISH STRONG!!!" I started to sprint towards the finish line, trying to convince myself that I had run 4 laps.

I crossed the finish line and immediately my 6th grade P.E. teacher came up to me with his stopwatch and eyebrows raised in excitement. I had won. I had made an AMAZING time....possibly even broke the 6th Grade Mile Record (can't remember for sure). The high school cross country coach came over, introduced himself and started recruiting me for the team. The other coaches surrounded me, talking of my talent and my potential. I stood in the spotlight beaming, completely ignoring the voice that was telling me I was a deceitful, conniving cheat.

It wasn't until after placing in the Division 1 Wisconsin High School State Cross-Country Championships that I confessed to my coach what I had done years earlier. I've often wondered how different my life would have been if I hadn't stopped for that drink on lap #3. Here is a picture of Haley finishing her mile on the track...Oh, and Yes....she ran the entire thing.

Do you ever...

2010-11-19T12:44:00.000-05:00

Do you ever lay on the ground and look up at the pale, white moon in the afternoon sky and think about how you are sitting on a speck of cosmic dust suspended in space at the mercy of its Creator?

Just wondering...

Do you ever sit on the driveway with your four-year old after breakfast and talk about the miracle of skin cell reproduction?

Do you ever hide your to-do list for a day so you can spend more time looking at your husband in the eyes and being there to listen when he decides to talk?

Do you ever sit at a lake with waves lapping and sea gulls laughing and listen to nothing but your thoughts?

Do you ever paint ceramic tea cups with your six year old and have as much fun as she is blending the colors?

Do you ever sit down and do nothing else except watch your children play as the autumn shadows dance on the wall?

Do you ever look at your baby and marvel at how she used to be the size of a poppy seed?

Do you ever look at everyone around you and marvel at how they used to be the size of a poppy seed?

Do you ever look AT YOURSELF and marvel at how YOU used to be the size of a poppy seed?

Do you ever look deeply at your reflection and ponder how one day God will draw your last breathe and you will cease to exist on this earth?

Do you ever put down the broom and have a tickle party in the middle of the day because the dirty floors will always be there...but your kids will not.

Do you ever say no to something so that your family can take a walk together in the last rays of the day?

Do you ever watch the sunset and linger as long as the colors?

Don't book your weekends.

November in Virginia

2010-11-19T10:28:00.000-05:00

Blogging Binge

2010-11-10T19:22:00.000-05:00

Blogging Binge: When you have neglected your blogging duties for over three weeks and finally sit down to chronicle the memories of the last month. Hope you enjoy!

LOSER

2010-11-10T19:14:00.001-05:00

Colby can't just enjoy something himself. If he finds something he really likes, he wants EVERYONE he knows to experience the bliss as well. Last year he read a thought-provoking book and purchased copies for thirty people. You probably were one of them! The latest joy has been his Nike Plus running watch. For months he told me that I needed to get one.

I refused. Haley's princess watch that I bought her for Christmas two years ago will suffice.

He BEGGED me to let him buy me one. I told him that if he bought me one....I would return it.

Last month he bought me my own Nike Plus watch and hid the receipt.

I love it.

I know, I know...call me a laggard on the innovation bell curve, but I am not quick to try new things. I need a Colby in my life to force me into putting off the old and trying the new. If you don't have a Nike Plus watch, you should. I'm not going to buy one for everyone, but just take my advice. Because I know my pace and how far I'm running now, I can set goals and work my way up. I'm already at 5 miles and am training for a 10K next week.

In this picture, Colby is showing his Dad some of the exercises we've been doing with Jillian Michaels and her new SHRED workout. I gained a lot of weight with this last pregnancy and Jillian has been whipping me back into shape. Not only have we done the workouts, but we have really gotten into watching THE BIGGEST LOSER on NBC.com. Addicted actually. It has actually motivated me seeing how 400+ pound people can lose weight. If they can, I can too, right?

More Grandparents!

2010-11-10T18:47:00.001-05:00

Nonny and Poppy drove their new car "Desmond" over 1,000 miles to come see us (Grandkids have a way of making you do absurd things). The weekend included bike rides with my Dad on Rt. 234, a trip to Old Mine Ranch to ride horses and feed animals, eating out, going to the 3rd annual Pelt Catanament, and listening to Gracie coo. The highlight of their trip was when Colby and I discovered a green sticker my mother had put on the back of her cell phone. It read "PLEASE...IF YOU FIND THIS PHONE, PLEASE CALL ME AT (###) ###-####." Colby and I looked at it, looked at each other and said, "Isn't this YOUR CELL PHONE NUMBER that you're asking them to CALL?" True Story. We love you Nonny! Don't lose your cell phone....you'll never get it back!

Reformation Day

2010-11-10T18:34:00.002-05:00

We like to celebrate Reformation Day by getting free candy. Some of Haley's friends at church must have explained proper Halloween etiquette to them, because they came up to me Sunday after church saying, "Wow! All you have to do in America is knock on the door and say 'Trick or Treat'! That is SO EASY!" Last year in Iceland, the kids had to go up to complete strangers and sing a song for them in order to earn candy (Darcy made up a rap and that seemed to pass.) This year was easier and we racked in a lot of chocolate to make up for the black licorice and other foreign candy from last year.

P.S. Haley's Mulan costume: $1.00. Gotta love Northern Virginia yard sales!

Great Grammy and Great Grandchild #11

2010-11-10T18:22:00.001-05:00

Fall Fun Activity

2010-11-10T18:19:00.001-05:00

There are few things nicer than returning home after a run on a cold, windy morning to the scene of your kids making homemade applesauce with their grandparents and the house smelling better than a Yankee Candle.

6.

2010-11-10T18:09:00.001-05:00

Haley Jane is 6. It's happening...everyone says it, but now we're experiencing it. Colby and I were both emotional as we recounted how quickly the years have flown and how unbelievable it is that our baby is a first grader. To celebrate the big day, we went to church and brought back eight girls with us. Haley had made out an itinerary that we executed quite well...right down to the princess pinata. After a princess lunch, princess pedicures, pin the jewel on the crown, a princess treasure hunt, and a princess cake we were ready for presents. In this picture, Haley is opening the Jasmine Barbie she had been asking for all year long (that I found at a yard sale for $1.50). Score.

A Celebration of Haley Jane

2010-11-10T18:00:00.000-05:00

To celebrate the life God has given to Haley Jane, I made a slideshow that documents the last six years.

Lennie

2010-11-10T17:58:00.002-05:00

Darcy ADORES her little sister. Sometimes a little too much. If you have been around our family for more than 90 seconds, you've most likely witnessed Darcy diving into Gracie's carseat, smothering her with kisses, and gritting her teeth and shaking because of how cute she is. It's a scene straight out of Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck ("We know you love them, but don't hurt the rabbits, Lennie..."). Gracie just blinks and tries to suck on Darcy's chin.

Gold Rain

2010-10-23T22:20:00.002-04:00

Today I decided to step out of the tornado and sit outside to write. It’s been a while since I’ve aired out my head. I’m learning that it is not selfish for me to take out time for myself but rather NECESSARY in order to be who I need to be for my kids and my husband.

Right now I am sitting outside watching red, orange, and gold rain down all around me. The evening light catches the leaves at a perfect angle and illuminates the tree like one grand, stain-glassed window in this outdoor sanctuary.

We moved again. This is the 8^th house we’ve lived in during the past two years…the adventure continues. Today finds me in the suburbs of Washington D.C in a subdivision named Montclair. Our friends, Tim and Amanda Long, are graciously letting us stay at their vacant home while they are in Florida for the next six months. It is a perfect place for this stage of the journey. “Our” new house has 3 levels, 4 bedrooms, a perfect adventure playland for the kids in the backyard, and even a fireplace. We are beyond blessed.

In some ways, I feel like God brought us out of America to bring us back here with new eyes. After spending 15 months in Iceland, I am now enamored with the most mundane, simple things. All summer long I couldn’t stop staring at the trees and vegetation here…each leaf a different shape, ivy climbing and decorating, making a mosaic of worshipful green.

I really feel God’s eye upon us. I’m not worried about the future because I know God has something up His sleeve. Too many things have happened. It’s so obvious that God has a plan and I’m learning to just kick up my feet in the passenger seat and trust that the Driver knows where He’s going. The more I travel through life, the more I’m realizing that God determines our steps. Even our choices somehow fit into His mastermind puzzle that we can’t even begin to figure out. So, we don’t. We just submit, trust….and then REST.

Silly Faces

2010-09-27T22:30:00.000-04:00

Upstate New York

2010-09-25T11:23:00.001-04:00

We just got back from a little roadtrip to Albany, New York. The kids did a really great job on the 9 hour drive and even helped feed Gracie so we didn't have to stop so much. We broke the trip up into 2 driving days and had an enjoyable time talking about each state we drove through. On Saturday, we were able to go to a local apple orchard there and pick apples, ride ponies, and enjoy a hay ride. On Sunday, Colby preached at a church where his old roommate is a pastor and we sang for the service. Good times had by all.

Gracie Photo Shoot

2010-09-14T20:20:00.004-04:00

Home

2010-09-07T16:51:00.003-04:00

The night before Gracie was discharged from the hospital, Haley asked a very practical question.

"Do I say 'Welcome Home' when Gracie comes to this house tomorrow? Or should I wait until we go back to the Locust Grove house?"

Hmmmm...For a moment it made me sad that our kids don't really know where they live, but it allowed Haley and I to have a good conversation. After the talk, I was reminded about a chapter in Tim Keller's book, Prodigal God (if you've not read this New York Times Bestseller author, now's the time!). He explores the idea of home...how evasive it is and yet how we all long for it.

On Saturday we packed up everything from the mission house in Crozet and drove back to the other house we've been using in Locust Grove. As Colby hunts for jobs, the reality is we will be moving again some time in the next year. Among other things, riding the rollercoaster that is called our life these past two years has truly bonded our nuclear family. I decided to make a welcome home sign for Gracie that would make sense to her and to us...

2010-09-07T16:25:00.001-04:00

Riverside Park has changed in the last 10 years just as much as Colby and I have! There is now a "Sprayground" in the middle of the park making it kid friendly. It was the perfect day there.

When it's still 100 degrees in Virginia in September, you NEED a
"sprayground" in the park!

This guy was having too much fun; I had to capture it.

A Happy Ninth Anniversary

2010-09-01T22:07:00.001-04:00

Nine years ago today Annie and I were married at Faith Baptist Church in LaCrosse, WI. Ten years ago today we began dating after I tried to convince her of it for nearly a year. So, how do you celebrate an anniversary when you have a three week old and your living in a temporary house in a town that you had never been to until a month ago? You go back to the place it all began and tell your kids stories about their mom and dad falling in love. For us, it all began at Riverside Park in Lynchburg, Virginia. It was at Riverside Park we started dating. It was at Riverside Park where we had so many wonderful walks and conversations. It was at Riverside Park where we were cited for trespassing after hours and handed down a sentence of 8 hours of community service by the judge. And, tonight, it was at Riverside Park where we danced to the music of Gracie's cries with a bouquet of weeds that Darcy so carefully and proudly picked for us while Haley hit us with sticks to stop us from kissing. It was perfect.

Moby for Men

2010-08-29T14:19:00.005-04:00

My wife recently purchased a Moby wrap. Now if you are not familiar with the Moby wrap it is a large piece of cloth that when wrapped appropriately allows you to "wear" your baby. For some people, wearing your baby is a way of life, and I am not simply talking about agricultural field workers in some far away place who do not have the opportunity to take some time off after the birth. There seems to be a whole movement of baby-wearing that is associated with theories of attachment for infants and so on. It may have its benefits, but we never wore Haley and Darcy, and they seem well adjusted so far. Anyway, I asked Annie about her interest in using the Moby wrap and she described it as an accessory of sorts...like a necklace that comes with the benefit of holding the baby hands-free. Sounds fine to me, but wow, it sure looks difficult to use.
The funniest experience I have had so far with the Moby wrap was after we received it in the mail. Inside on the back of the user's manual was the picture you see here. Now, I am no marketing expert, but I have to guess that the potential market for this specific "camouflage" real tree Moby is actually pretty low. The intersection of hunters and Moby baby-wearers cannot be populated with a large crowd of people. I just can't see myself sitting in a tree stand waiting for a trophy buck, while wearing Gracie. Whatever benefits that could be conferred by wearing the child most certainly would be counterbalanced by the risks of firing a gun or pulling back a bow string. But hey, I don't work for Moby...and just maybe they know something I don't.

A Quiet Weekend

2010-08-28T21:44:00.002-04:00

After seventeen days in the hospital we have enjoyed a great weekend at the house in Crozet settling in to taking care of Gracie. Apart from a few extra things to do each morning we are really enjoying a very normal baby experience. In fact unless you would know the back story, you wouldn't even be able to tell anything has been going on.

He moves in mysterious ways...

2010-08-27T11:28:00.003-04:00

Part of living by faith is learning to respond to the mysterious circumstances that God sometimes uses to direct our paths. There are times in life when despite where we anticipated to be, we find ourselves in another place. If you would have asked me a year ago where I would be at this time I would have told you that I could see myself living in Iceland for many years to come. Even as Gracie was diagnosed in April I remained hopeful that the condition would be treatable with a single procedure and we could plan for a return to Iceland some time after the 1st of the year. As the doctors said, "We won't know what we are really dealing with until Gracie is born." So we waited...

The night Gracie was born she had an immediate Echo-Cardiogram and at 1:30am we went to the NICU to find out what the results were. For us it was much more than just the results and treatment that we were awaiting, but also an indication of what our future plans would be. When we found out that the condition was severe and the treatment plan would require three surgeries, we knew the implications. We would be staying in the U.S. for the foreseeable future.

At this point, we do not yet know where the next step will be. I have begun the process of looking for a new position of ministry here in the U.S. and pray that the process will be swift, and trust that in due time God will bring us to the place He has prepared. I vacillate between calm excitement about the journey ahead and a sober sort of anxiousness to find some stability. Even more, I thank God for how He has generously provided for us through the support of our current employer and the generosity of friends, allowing us to enter the process with a confident peace.

So, what about Iceland? At this point it is hard to anticipate how God will work in our lives in the future and where this story will lead for the Garman family. It didn't take long to find a place in our heart for Reykjavik. Hardly a day goes by where I do not still exercise my language skills by reading the Icelandic news or one of the many novels I brought home. Further, we think often of our friends there, so many of whom have been so supportive with kind words and prayer during the past month. The mere mention of the word "Iceland" brings to mind a myriad of faces and sweet memories of all of our friends. The simplest answer to the question is, "We will just have to wait and see what the Lord does, He moves in mysterious ways."

God moves in a mysterious way
his wonders to perform;
He plants his footsteps in the sea,
and rides upon the storm.

Deep in unfathomable mines
of never failing skill,
He treasures up his bright designs
and works his sovereign will.

You fearful saints, fresh courage take;
the clouds you so much dread
Are big with mercy and shall break
in blessings on your head.

His purposes will ripen fast,
unfolding every hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste,
but sweet will be the flower.

Blind unbelief is sure to err
and scan his work in vain:
God is his own interpreter,
and he will make it plain.

--William Cowper

Steppin' Out

2010-08-25T20:53:00.002-04:00

...of the hospital that is. Tonight is a daddy-daughter sleepover at the hospital. For release, we had to be responsible for Gracie with all of her little details for an entire day. So I (Colby) am staying the night here with Gracie and getting us ready for the big release day tomorrow. In preparation for her release we had to be trained on giving her meds, using the pulse oxymeter we will be taking home with us, and our new baby scale. We took a CPR course and covered all the what-to-do-when possibilities that one could possibly handle in a short period of time. The bottom line is Gracie will be leaving the hospital tomorrow only 9 days after major open-heart surgery and 17 days after she was born. We are so grateful, she has really recovered at best-case scenario speed.

Our Little Graduate!

2010-08-24T21:12:00.001-04:00

Gracie is doing so well that she graduated from the Intensive Care Unit (they are just waiting for a room to open up on the pediatric floor to transfer her over). The doctors just stopped by and actually said that she could go HOME tomorrow, to which Annie almost wet her pants. We don't feel totally comfortable bringing her home tomorrow, but maybe after getting CPR trained and learning about her Pulse-Ox machine, we'll feel ready to go. We couldn't be happier with her progress. Although she is a little bit less than her birth weight, Gracie's eating 2 ounces every 3 hours and is keeping it down. It's unbelievable to think of how far she's come in just one short week...Go Gracie Girl!

Great Weekend for the Whole Family!

2010-08-22T15:57:00.004-04:00

First for the Gracie Update: We began last week with a bed full of wires and now, as you see, Gracie has shed most of her support and is doing great. The big steps in the past few days have been the removal of her breathing tube and RA line on Friday morning, and the removal of her chest tube and arterial line on Saturday. All of these are big steps on the road to recovery. The only hiccup has been the withdrawl symptoms Gracie has had from the pain medicine she was on during recovery. The doctors are now working to make a few adjustments to help get through the withdrawl period and every thing seems to be going fine.

And for the Rest of Us: With Gracie doing so well Annie and I visited her on Saturday morning and then took off for Lancaster, PA, for the party of the year. My sister Brooke got married yesterday to Randy Fischer in a wonderful ceremony at Stumptown Mennonite Church followed by a great reception at The Eden in Lancaster. We made it just in time for the festivities and joined Haley and Darcy who were sent on ahead to anchor the Virginia Garman contingent in case we couldn't make it. After a great night's stay at Shenk Manor B&B, courtesy of Marty and Joyce Shenk we headed back to VA .

The Crash...(you should know about it.)

2010-08-20T15:01:00.002-04:00

Annie and I consider ourselves observers. We observe everything we can...smells, sights, people, accents, our children, personalities, and of course our favorite...idiosyncrasies (ours and others). We love to find patterns in things and anticipate things, maybe to a disagreeable fault. Over the past two years, amidst our various crazy times we have observed a pattern that is now unmistakable...it's called The Crash. Most of you who are more intelligent than us probably already know about the crash, but I am totally amazed to see how consistent it is. Every high adrenaline/intensely stressful experience seems to be followed by the dearly beloved adrenal nose dive.

Symptoms of the crash include: hyper-sensitivity, temporary irrationality, low-energy, moodiness, magnification, weepiness, and being ridiculous.

Now before you get carried away, we're not simply talking about what women commonly call the "baby blues". These are only my symptoms, not Annie's.

As of Wednesday night we had gotten over the huge surgery day, Annie's parents headed to the airport, Haley and Darcy we're on their way to Aunt Brookie's wedding weekend, and it was just Annie and I with Gracie. Ahh, deep breath amidst the chaos. Needless to say Thursday morning we woke up to the The Crash and stumbled our way through the day, happy to bid it farewell.

So why do I tell you all this personal baloney? It's not because we want to garner your sympathy and concern. Someday, when I look back at the blog I don't want to feel like we ignored the bumps and bruises of the territory. I don't want people who read and follow our journey to see our smiling pictures and think that we haven't had our sketchy moments. Furthermore, when we write about the joys and celebrations I want you to be able to take them seriously as well, knowing that we have been honest about the hard parts.

Sitting here today -- this side of the crash -- we celebrate how gracious God has been to sustain us through the past ten days. We have had more to celebrate than to fear. Gracie is breathing on her own, without a tube in her nose. She looks peaceful and on the way to recovery.

Something the Lord Made

2010-08-19T11:57:00.002-04:00

I haven't seen the film, but have heard about it from several people over the last couple of months. So why am I writing about it? The film tells the story of Vivien Thomas (a black cardiac research assistant) and Alfred Blalock (The "Blue Baby Doctor"), the two men largely responsible for pioneering the usage of what is now called the Blalock-Taussig Shunt (BT shunt for short) to treat "Blue Babies". It explores the nature of their research and relationship in the peculiar times before the advancements of the Civil Rights movement. Since the main part of Gracie's surgery was the installation of a BT shunt, I thought some of you might be interested in knowing about it. Whatever you do, don't tell me about it because a year from now I might want to watch it.

The Champ

2010-08-17T17:30:00.001-04:00

Super proud of our little girl!

The Day

2010-08-17T15:25:00.001-04:00

Did you know that in order to perform open heart surgery the doctors have to first STOP the heart? Well, I just learned that this week.

There are some details that I'd rather not know...

Right now Gracie is in open heart surgery. Anticipating this moment was worse than the actual moment. Last night we met with the doctors and had a Pre-Operation meeting where they go over every possible thing that could go wrong. It was so brutal that I had to leave....before it even started. When Colby walked out of the meeting, he had lost most of the color in his face and lips.

We were so shaken up we didn't know what to do with ourselves. I wasn't sure I wanted to be at the hospital for the whole ordeal; Colby didn't know if that was best for me. We just weren't sure how to handle it and it was putting strain on our communication. It's really amazing how God knows how much is enough. Right when we were about to reach our breaking point, He did something very supernatural and special to lift the heaviness. I wish I could share the whole story now....but there is only 11 minutes of battery life left on this computer....and I have no idea where the charger is.

So, I guess it's time for me to start writing a book. Someone told me recently that they were very disappointed how little I've written about this experience. It has been almost too emotional and personal to share via the blog, but I realize now that some people could benefit from my words. I'm feeling like the ONLY way I know how to deal with this is through writing, so I might as well make it available to others who are going through difficulties. More on this topic later...

This morning I woke up at 3:30am and couldn't go back to sleep, so I drove deep into the mountains on Skyline Drive. I watched the dynamic stars melt away into the pre-dawn colors. I didn't put on any music or even pray out loud to Jesus. It was too solemn and sacred of a moment to even speak. Later in the drive I put on a cd that we made a few weeks ago using GarageBand at the Long's house. The cd only has one song on it...I wrote it a few years ago. I guess wrote it is the wrong way to put it. It is Jude 1:25. I am not the best singer, but this song is special because Colby and I sing it together and it makes me emotional to hear our voices blend together. It was the only song I listened to, and I listened to it over and over again while the orange sun rose over the misty valley below. If you click here, you can listen to a part of my morning.

For my ride down the mountain, I listened to a cd of the gospel of Mark. I listened to the life of Jesus, amazed that a man who lived over 2000 years ago could make such an impact on history and on my life today. I don't get it sometimes...all I know is that it's true.

I'm at the hospital now. There is a sign right outside this door in the hallway that says, "UVA MEDICAL CENTER....Good Outcomes Are in Our Hands." Gracie's life is not in UVA's hands right now. It's not in the surgeon's hands. Gracie's life has been and always will be in God's hands. Thank you Jesus that we can rest in you...the author of life.

Pros and Cons of Still Looking Pregnant After You've Delivered

2010-08-14T16:12:00.000-04:00

CONS
1. It is depressing.
2. Your 4 year old still kisses your stomach and tells the baby hello.
3. Your 5 year old (who is only slightly more logical) asks when the next baby is coming out.
4. You have to avoid eye contact with people in elevators when you see them look down at your belly and then up at you in an attempt to bypass the awkward question, "So...when is your baby due?"

PROS
1. People still are kind and patient with you in public because they think you're expecting.
2. In case you were too occupied during pregnancy to do a pre-natal photo shoot LIKE THIS, you still have time. Noone will ever know.
3. No pressure to go running or do sit-ups. Doctors orders. Eat another piece of carrot cake instead.
4. In the end, it is worth it to have a little more fat on your body and another human being in this world that is your very own flesh and blood.

The Lightning Round

2010-08-13T23:20:00.002-04:00

- Reverse Culture Shock. Last week we discovered Onesty pool at Meade Park in C-ville. It’s a great place for kids, but a strange experience after living in Iceland for a while. In Iceland there is a lone pool monitor in a tower with one-way glass. When you walk in you think, “wow it must be my job to watch my kid.” Which is wonderful because then your child can ride the big slide even when they’re two years old. Here in the grand republic the pool has one lifeguard per child and security station zapping children that are too short to go up the steps to the slide. The girls didn’t get to go down the slide, but they were really, really safe.
- Weight Watchers Strawberry Yogurt Bars. Ever since I limited myself to 2500 calories a day I’ve had to try and find some low cal snacks. Once you get past buying something called weight watchers, these little bars are great. It even says the serving size is 2 bars. Now that’s low cal.
- Side Job. Now that I am a new dad again I have moments where I think I know what it’s like to work on a dairy farm. I remember my cousin use to give his father-in-law (a dairy farmer) a day off from the work for Christmas. If you don’t understand it, just move on.
- Taste and See: For the past several weeks I’ve been reading some daily devotional thoughts from a book by John Piper of this title. Some of you are probably raving fans, and others of you don’t know who he is. Either way, I think Piper is most interesting and insightful in these daily snippets. I have often found his longer works a bit…how do you say it…long, but I really njoy his short game.
- If you read, buy a kindle. The Kindle is now $139 without the 3G wireless feature (which I do not find all that necessary). With book prices at $9.99 you cover your cost after about 14 books. I still love mine and would buy another one in a heartbeat.
- Gracie’s doctors. I saw Gracie’s cardiologist at the gelato shop this evening and was reminded just how personable and compassionate the medical staff at UVA has been (yes, I ate some gelato and may have cheated my calorie limit just this once). With surgery coming up on Tuesday we feel as great as two parents can with a little one going into open-heart surgery.

Surgery Date

2010-08-12T23:08:00.003-04:00

First Off, I have neglected to give all the essentials details that people ask for when a baby is born. So here goes, Gracie Kane Garman was born at 11:09PM on August 9th, 2010. She weighed 7lbs. 3 oz (that's 3.25 kg for my Icelandic friends) and was 20 inches long.

The doctors have scheduled Gracie's surgery for Tuesday at 12:00PM. The surgery will take 2-3 hours and is pretty much a miracle of modern medicine. The doctors will be placing a 3.5mm shunt on ridiculously small arteries and sewing it on with thread that is not visible to the naked eye. Her heart itself is only the size of a plumb. The surgery will be open-heart and she will have to go on a blood bypass, so it is a pretty intense deal.

We are so thankful for the great team of doctors and surgeons here at UVA that have helped us prepare for the upcoming week. We really feel like God has directed us to a great place where we can feel as comfortable as possible with this vulnerable situation. We have certainly sensed God's sustaining grace in the past few days and have really been able to enjoy seeing our little girl without feeling overwhelmed with anxiety and fears.

Thank you to all of you who have prayed for us these past few days and for all of the kind words of encouragement and celebration. Please continue to pray for little Gracie and the rest of the family as we get ready for Tuesday.

Gracie and her Grandmas

2010-08-11T22:27:00.003-04:00

Little Gracie got to have some Grandma time today and she really relaxed and enjoyed herself.

We were told today that Gracie's first procedure will be next week some time. It may be on Tuesday, but no earlier than that. She will have a Blalock-Taussig Shunt surgically installed between the aorta and the pulmonary artery, as well as a little procedure done on her atrial septum. It is the first surgery in a series of 3 surgeries called a fontan procedure. The second surgery will be at the 4-6 month timeframe and the third somewhere around three years.

Annie was discharged today and is doing really well. We are really enjoying our time visiting with Gracie are grateful that we have been able to really enjoy these first few days with her. As you can see from the pictures she is just a little doll.

So, what's next?

2010-08-10T13:52:00.002-04:00

Immediately after Gracie was born the pediatric cardiologist did an echocardiogram to get a better look at Gracie's heart. If you don't know what's going on you should read this first. The heart echo confirmed the diagnosis that was given for Gracie while she was in Utero. Her pulmonary valve is blocked and the right side of her heart is very small and under-developed. The doctors will be meeting together today and tomorrow to try and determine the best course of action from here. She will likely have a series of procedures called a "Fontan" beginning with a procedure to make sure her ductus arteriosus remains patent (open). The first procedure will probably be done in a couple of days. It is a temporary procedure that will allow her to grow for a few months before another procedure can be done.

Shorthand: Gracie is healthy right now, but her heart will have to be re-arranged a bit to help her remain healthy. The re-arrangment will probably take three steps in the first couple years of her life.

While we wait for the rest of the plan to come together we are enjoying our new little bundle and getting ready to introduce her to her very excited sisters.

Welcome Gracie...The Birthday Gift

2010-08-10T00:53:00.003-04:00

Gracie and Daddy will just have to a share a birthday! What a rare gift to welcome a baby on your birthday. She was born at 11:12PM on August 9th, 2010. We were told to expect here to be a little "blue" upon arrival and she may have been for the first minute or so, but she was really looking good when her mommy got to hold her a few minutes later. Right now she's being tested and we are waiting to here the results of the tests being done on her heart. Annie is healthy and of course tired, but most of all we are thankful to God for our little Gracie.

The Waiting Room...

2010-08-09T13:46:00.002-04:00

Annie woke me up at 7:00 AM this morning and said, "Happy Birthday! I think I am going into labor." The contractions seemed to be steady for the greater part of the next hour, and I had packed the car to be ready to go the hospital. By 8:00 the contractions had slowed and became milder. We all ate breakfast and waited for them to pick back up. With no signs of action on the horizon I headed out for a run hoping to return and go to the hospital. Since that time the contractions have been about 15-20 minutes apart and we have been just hanging out around the house. So we wait...

The Lightning Round

2010-08-06T15:10:00.003-04:00

I often do not write about things that are going on because they do not seem to deserve an entire post. At the same time I often want to mention these very things and see what others might have to say. My goal is to resolve the tension in which I only blog those things that a general audience would be really interested in, while commonly having thoughts about posts that I know will interest a certain few. My new solution to the problem is the classic game-show lightning round, hopefully a new weekly item.

-I recently got a Nike+ running band. I have always wanted to have a way to know basic stats of my workout while it is in progress, but could never bring myself to "get a Garmin" GPS watch. The Nike+ is a great solution, providing time, pace, distance, and calorie information throughout the run. It also hooks up to the computer and keeps a running log with great information and goal setting features. I highly recommend it to any runners out there.

- I am currently reading a classic book on Biblical Theology by Geerhardus Vos. It is a bit on the heavy side as far as the language and the style, but well worth trudging through for its insights into reading the Bible from a redemptive-historical perspective.

- On that note, if you are a preacher you need to download this series of lectures from Edmund Clowney and Tim Keller on Christ-centered preaching. They have been great running partners for me lately.

-If you are interested in a peek into Icelandic culture, one way to do it is through a series of crime-fiction novels written by one of Iceland's most succesful writers. They are available in english and are a fun read. I have been reading them in Icelandic, but I am sure the cultural setting would be as interesting in the translations as well.

- From Crozet, VA, we can be on the Blue Ridge Parkway in less than 15 minutes. The BRP is where Annie and I went on our first non-date. It is where we went on our first date. It is also where we got engaged. Last week we took the girls up there for an evening picnic and sunset and I could not help feeling a "life has come full circle moment".

Settled

2010-07-30T22:30:00.000-04:00

Yesterday we drove to our Dr's appointment at UVA Medical with our car all packed for the long stay here. The appointment went well and found out that I am now dilated 2 cm. The Dr. asked me if I wanted to be induced on Sunday....it was tempting, but I declined. We want her to cook as long as possible.

Last night for story time, Colby recounted the last two years of our life and all the different places and houses we've lived in. Haley remembers every detail of this journey and it was fun to talk about all we've seen and learned through it. Occasionally someone will show sympathy for our anything-but-stable lives and be apologetic. They must not understand the rich experience that we've been granted and how invaluable that its been. I think it's been the greatest thing.

We are all settled in Charlottesville now (actually a town west of it called Crozet). We are staying in a 4 bedroom, furnished house with a huge playground and tree house in the backyard. People actually sit on their front porch and talk to each other. A neighbor baked us bread today and assured me that if I went into labor in the middle of the night, she would be there to help. We are at the foot of the Blue Ridge Parkway-- the very mountains where Colby proposed nine years ago. I love the raw beauty of this area and am SO grateful for a respite as we wait for this to all go down.

9th(??) Annual Garman Beach Week

2010-07-23T17:34:00.001-04:00

In May when I went to my first Doctor's appointment at UVA, I asked tons of questions...One of them was, "Can I still go to beach week in July?" When he said, "I don't see why not," we were both surprised. What a fun week of cousins, waves, games, sunshine, biking, good food, Colby getting stung by a jellyfish, and many other memories. You can see the rest of the story here...

Next Stop Charlottesville

2010-07-23T14:07:00.003-04:00

On July 8th we were driving home from one of our hospital appointments in Charlottesville, VA (about 1.5 hours from where we are currently staying) and we were trying to figure out the details of having a baby that far away. We were trying to figure out when we would go to C-ville. We were trying to figure out where we would stay during the likely surgery. We were trying to figure out where we would stay during the recovery time. We were trying to figure out how we would make sure Haley and Darcy would be able to be with us as much as possible and how Annie would be able to recover from having a baby while still waiting for the baby to come home from the hospital and staying in temporary situations in the meantime.

As we were driving home, it was sort of clear that we had no real satisfactory game plan. We were on the waiting list at a few places provided for people in situations like ours. We knew that we could always stay in a hotel if we needed to, but there are pluses and minuses to hotel livin'. As we drove home I voiced a prayer to God, asking for Him to provide a situation that would keep our family together and make the upcoming experience a little less stressful.

Now this doesn't happen every time I ask for something, but when we got home I opened my e-mail to find an offer for a place to stay from July 29-August 29th about thirteen miles from the hospital. Thanks to Crozet Baptist Church, figuring out this next month just got a little easier. So on July 29th, we will go to a doctor's appointment at UVA and then settle in for the month there in Crozet and wait.

Fourth

2010-07-11T23:01:00.002-04:00

I have to say....being back in America for the Fourth of July was SO amazing. It was the best Fourth I can remember; I appreciate my country more than I ever have. We were able to go to three different fireworks shows. For the first one, I just stepped outside and was able to see the firework show from our front porch. It was like my own personal worship service as the sky filled with lights and I just thanked God for our freedom. This year, as the national anthem was sung, I listened and hung onto every word.

The parade that our community threw on July 3rd, however, was the quietest parade I'd ever been to. The kids brought bags to collect all their candy and were stoaked to participate in a good 'ol American parade. Darcy collected ONE Werther's Original and ONE peppermint wheel. The parade mostly consisted of elderly people driving by in old cars....every 4 minutes. At one point during a big lull, a teenage boy walked on the street past us. Colby, ever the comedian, started clapping for him to provide some humor to the people around us. Darcy looked up at Colby and with honest amazement asked, "Did that boy fighted in the Civil War?"

My Top Ten Favorite Things about Living at the Jessup Lake House

2010-07-02T09:35:00.000-04:00

10. Having two bathrooms (Oh, the things you take for granted...)
9. A King-sized bed (How can we ever go back to a double again?)
8. A themed kitchen (Haley said the other day, "Wow, they must really like apples)
7. Listening to the rain fall on the sky lights
6. A bathtub (I don't think they believe in bathtubs in Europe)
5. A big yard and a long driveway for the kids to ride their bikes on (My new favorite words to say: "Kids, go OUTSIDE and play!)
4. A tape player/cd player/ radio (Seriously. I have wanted a boombox for so long)
3. Having our own private beach (Well, kind of private...)
2. Spending mornings on the porch listening to the birds and praying before the kids wake up
1. Having the Cliftons as neighbors (We even have walkie-talkies!)

In Memory of Manute Bol

2010-07-01T09:55:00.002-04:00

When I was a kid, Manute Bol was a spectacle of the NBA. In the eyes of a young boy, he was something akin to a traveling circus attraction and I remember watching him on TV in wonder. When I heard that he died last week I saw a few articles about his humanitarian work in his native Sudan and was impressed. Then I saw this article from The Wall Street Journal and thought it would be good to pass along. It may be possible to describe my life in two stages: The first stage in which sport stars were the pinnacle of what I looked up to and the second where Jesus became my greatest treasure. I probably would not have selected Manute Bol for my basketball dream team, but from all that I have learned about him since his death, it sounds like he succeeded in the things that mattered most. You can read the article here.

Favorite corner

2010-06-27T21:53:00.002-04:00

I absolutely love Colby's hometown Galeton, PA. It is the cutest town I have ever seen. There are church bells that echo off the mountains surrounding its quaint downtown and a river that runs through it. I have thoroughly enjoyed visiting with his parents, teaching Darcy to ride her new bike, hiking through the woods with Haley and finding deer tracks, going out for ice cream, watching Colby fly-fish, swimming in Lyman Lake, sitting on the porch with a good book, talking to neighbors, taking walks around town while Colby tells me childhood stories, having dinner outside on the picnic table every night, and taking time to give the girls pedicures. Even though the population of Galeton is less than 1200 and there is only one stop light in town, it has become one of my favorite corners of the world.

Chasin' the Dream...

2010-06-23T22:36:00.000-04:00

"Do you know what I've been thinking about lately?" I asked Colby after he'd returned back to the states.

"What...Fly-fishing in Potter County?"

I never got a chance to tell him what was on MY mind...he went on and on about his fly-fishing fantasies. We arrived in Northern PA yesterday and today took the kids fly-fishing at a local fish farm. Half-way through the afternoon, Darcy became an animal rights activist and refused to take part in the brutality. I won't be surprised if she never eats fish again...

My Dad

2010-06-20T06:00:00.001-04:00

I really like this picture of my Dad because if you look closely, you can see the brown backpack that he’s wearing. It may not strike anyone else, but it strikes me because that is the backpack that I used in middle school. Never mind that he has been a engineer at TRANE company for the past 35 years, has designed and patented products, and in his free time started a side business. It’s not as though my Dad can’t afford to buy a new backpack; but he’s a man of principle and the principle in this case is: Why buy a new backpack when you already have one that works just fine?

My Dad recently flew out to visit me and took me grocery shopping. When we went down the paper products aisle, I wasn’t sure what to expect. Do I dare ask for it? What will he say? Is it asking for too much? Maybe I shouldn’t….

I decided to take the plunge and nonchalantly put zip-loc bags in the cart. Not being able to slip anything past him, my Dad picked up the product, examined it, and looked for the price. I knew what was coming next: “Now, I don’t mind buying these for you as long as you’re careful not to waste them.” I knew exactly what he meant…My Dad was raised in a frugal home and passed down to his kids this value. Growing up, my mom dutifully packed a lunch for my Dad every week day. And every week day, my Dad would come home at 5:30, kiss my mom and return his brown paper lunch bag and ziploc bags to her. She would wash them out and dry them in preparation for the next day’s lunch. I never knew differently of the world.

My Dad is my biggest fan. He was a good runner back in his day and encouraged/forced me to run track as well. During one of my first track meets, an official warned him that if he ever ran along side of me during the 400 meter dash again, I would be disqualified. He was introduced to the bleachers, but nevertheless I could hear him every step of my race.

Dad, since you check the blog multiple times a day (mostly to your disappointment,) I thought I would make your day by actually blogging and dedicating this post to you. Thank you for all the sacrifices you made to give me the life I have now. Thank you for loving me and teaching me to love God. Thank you for being a supportive Dad and teaching me to savor and appreciate the little things…like a fresh brown paper bag and brand new Zip-loc bags.

Just for the record...

2010-06-17T23:02:00.000-04:00

Darcy is four!

Virginia Rain

2010-06-16T21:48:00.002-04:00

In Iceland, kids go outside EVERY DAY for recess....It doesn't matter if it's hailing, snowing, raining, sleeting, or all of the above. I was asking Haley's teacher about this and expressed some of my concerns. Her response: "Well, if it's so windy that the kids can't stand up, then we let them come inside."

Wow... how thoughtful.

I'm not knocking the Icelandic way. Icelanders are the toughest people I've ever met, and toughening is something the Garman girls need a little bit of. It was with great delight that I watched my kids run out in the rain and play during the first Virginia rain shower. Thank you, Iceland....