Saturday, February 12, 2011

Always Missing

I think this picture pretty much sums up my life.

No matter how hard I try, there is always one sock missing.

The other day we had two appointments on the calendar.  I rehearsed with the kids our schedule for the day, I packed lunches, I made sure I had a bottle ready, and I even got the house all picked up so that it would look perfect when we returned home.  I was trying so hard.  We checked off all the subjects for school, we all had clean bodies and all the kids nails were finally trimmed.  Then, fearing that Colby's rather casual pace would make us late to the appointment, I tried to motivate him by using an abrasive tone and shame tactics.  In my desperate attempt to execute the day perfectly, I failed.

Lesson Learned:  I will NEVER have it totally together.

Not only will I never attain perfection, but neither will my house.

Even if there IS a moment
when the last of the laundry is folded and put away,
the kitchen sink is empty and shiny,
the carpet's vacuum lines are freshly parallel,
the bathroom smells good,
the dust has all been eradicated,
and the toothpaste has all been chiseled from the sink...

It will only last...until somebody moves.

Even if I did somehow manage to keep my house to looking like a museum, I will still fall short in my relationships, snap at my mom when she puts cups on the wrong rack of the dishwasher, or passive-aggressively punish Colby with silence when he chooses to read the Drudge Report instead of participating in garage-cleaning day.  And, if I'm able to make it a whole day where I'm not critical of my husband and I only rebuke my kids in gentleness and love, there are inevitably attitudes of my heart that still miss the mark of perfection.

One sock is always missing.

This is rather new concept for me.  Not that I wasn't taught verses like Romans 3:23 or 3:10.  I knew in theory that I was a sinner, but since I've become a wife and mother I have come to a new knowledge that has been both breaking and beautiful.  I realize now more than ever how desperate I am for Jesus and His grace.  I will never have it together and that's okay.  He is the only one who did.  As I learn to live in an imperfect world and in an imperfect body, I rest on His righteousness that makes me whole.  I hope you do too.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Well written, Annie. I think we can all identify with that at some point in our lives. Or multiple points, as it were. Just when we think we've found the one sock and seem to get it right, the other goes missing.